Hello Everyone,

It is with a very heavy heart that I write this entry, but I feel it has a bearing on the wedding and something which I have been thinking alot about so deserves to be recorded here.

Yesterday a very dear friend of mine Jan Wilkins died.  Many of you reading this blog had met Jan at one gathering or another and she had been fighting cancer for over 3 years, yes 3 whole years.  What started out as breast cancer turned into other cancers unforuntaley ending yesterday when Jan lost the fight.

Jan was an amazing lady and one of my dearest friends.  She was a real sieze the day, don't sweat the small stuff person.  When Dave and I last saw her (only 2 weeks ago) she was in good spirits and although obviously tired looked heathly.  She was telling me I must not get too dramatic about the wedding and that there is more to life than the covers on chairs and waitors with gloves (a long story).  I will remember Jan for many things, the most important of which was her view that you should always have something to look forward to.  Whether it is a holiday, a party, anything, but always have something to look forward to.  It is something I have followed for probably 5 years now and it is definatly a good idea in life.

I will miss Jan terribly and will especially miss her on our big day.  Weddings and in fact any large event have a habbit of reminding you of the people who are "missing out".  Dave and I have a number of people who we wish were able to attend the big day.  To name a few Ted Evans, Arthur Petch, Rose and Ed Todd, Aunt Bess, Nanny Parsons, Grandad Renowden and probably many more. It always feels like these people have been cheated out of a day they should have seen and have missed something which they had a right too.

However, and I know Jan would agree with this sentiment, the important thing on a day such as a wedding is to remember those who cannot attend but leave these other feelings at home.  Jan and all the others will be sorely missed and we will rememebr them and think of them.   But far more important, is to remember them with a smile (and in Jan's case a drink of something bubbly) not a tear. 

Jan's story is told on her husband H's blog at www.my.telegraph.co.uk/aitch  I would recommend reading it, but it is not for the feint hearted.  The message with all of this is breast cancer is a killer, but it is also easily detected and in many cases is treatable.  So in the words of my other good friend H, ladies - keep checking those tits. :)

Love and Hugs

C

Something which recieves a lot of mileage in Wedding related press is whether or not in the modern world, a woman should change her name when she becomes married.  

This is something which for many years, even before Dave and I ever got together, I said I would never do.  I am an Evans, I have always been an Evans and its MY NAME.  

There are benefits to having such a comman surname.  There is a certain amount of anonimity, there are lots of Evans's in the world and probably quite a few Ceri Evans's, both male and female.

It gives me an immediate national identity, I have a very Welsh first and second name.  Although as we have discovered I have two welsh Great Great Grandparents and that is as close as it gets.  

It is near the start of the alphabet without being first.  In any kind of situation which is alphabetised you are near the beginning without having to go first, always useful when you are not sure of your ground.  But similarly useful when you might not want to be first, but you don't want to be last either. 

Another consideration is I have always been an Evans, everyone knows me as an Evans and if I change my name will people still be able to find me?

On the flip side, I am getting married and that is a big change, a change in my name reflects that change and the difference to my life marriage may bring.  I effectivly stop being my parents problem and become part of the Parsons family.  

The Parsons name is strong and has no immediate nationality or identity.  It has an associattion to the church,  which could be useful in some situations and brings an air of trustworthiness.

Dave is a Parsnip and I am going to be his wife and I have a lot of pride associated with that and therefore see taking his name as an extension of that. 

And there is all the hassle of having to change my name on every document, bank account, company file there is about me.  

So what can I say, I am undecided, but at least I have a year to think about it:)

Hello all,
I am aware it has been too long since my last blog post and I will try and do better from now on.

After having a little time off Wedding Planning I am now back into it in full swing.  Two weeks ago I met my very good friend and chief bridesmaid Vicky in Newport, SWales to do some dress shopping.  Now I know it sounds odd to be living in Southampton and shopping for dresses in S.Wales but for some reason they have an abundance of wedding dress shops and one of them is particularly helpful (It is where Vicky bought her wedding dress).  I tried 6 dresses on and liked two of them enough to take the details and saw a number of other possibilities.

Big thanks to Vicky for all her help and support, having gone dress shopping for a numebr of other people, I didn't realise how stressful it is and she was great.
And so this weekend the dress search came to Southampton.  I went to "Cloud Nine" in Locks Heath and tried on what I thought was "the dress" an it is lovely, but not amazing.  However another one in this shop was very nice and is made by a company called Ellis Bridal.  Very spooky as for anyone who doesn't know my grandad's name was Ellis!

And then to Brides of Southampton.  I have been in this shop as a spectator a number of times, but it is very different for the bride to be.  And sooooo tiring! You wouldn't believe how tired I was after 2hrs of trying on dresses.  However of about 10 dresses I tried on I liked 6 and have now found them all on the internet so have pictures to look at and contemplate.  

So the basic story is all is well.  Dress search is coming along, going to go to CHicester as I am told there are a number of nice shops there and have a look and aim to make a deicison before the end of September.
As for other items, Dave and I still need to sit down and start looking at photographers and I contacted a hair and make-up lady but she is booked for nect year already!!  So I will have to keep looking on that.  

Hopefully invitations to our engagement party and Save the Date cards have been recieved by the relevant people.  We have not sent Save the Date cards to everyone, just to those who we thought would need ot book it in the diary and possibly book accomodation.  

So things are going well and progress is being made.

P.SThe worst thing now is the thought that at some point I am going to have to decide on a dress and for anyone who doesn't know I am rubbish at this sort of decision.AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH :)